


in another life

by chwehanyus



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, M/M, Sad Ending, Steve Needs a Hug, Steve and Tony go to Vormir, Tony Stark Has A Heart, also pepper and tony aren’t together, and i break my heart in the process
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-23
Updated: 2019-06-23
Packaged: 2020-05-18 07:28:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19329910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chwehanyus/pseuds/chwehanyus
Summary: “What you seek lies in front of you, as does what you fear. For in order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange.”“A soul... for a soul.”Where Steve Rogers and Tony Stark are the ones that end up going to Vormir.





	in another life

**Author's Note:**

> this is. my first fic ever (on ao3 at least)! so hiii
> 
> no idea why i ended up hurting myself this much but im hoping any future works i may create are whole light years happier big oooof. plus its a little short bc i just had a Spur Of The Moment (TM) thing and threw this together just to test the waters a lil yanno
> 
> but ye without further ado. stony rights i guess

* * *

“Welcome, Anthony, son of Maria. Steven, son of Sarah.”

 

"You have got to be shitting me,” Steve murmured.

 

An all-too-familiar face floated — like, actually _floated_ — towards him, the faint hum of his past slowly creeping up his neck. As an Avenger, his own definition of impossible has been redefined over, and over, and over again, and expecting the unexpected automatically came with the package.

Coming face-to-face with your somehow surviving arch-nemesis shouldn’t have phased him as much as it did.

 

He just simply didn’t know how to react.

 

There was anger, stale and dry that threatened to bubble through once more, and there was a numbing loss, once dormant, tearing him apart at the seams. Red Skull didn’t seem to mirror his shock, although Steve could’ve sworn there was a glimpse of twisted euphoria on his face when they made eye contact.

But just before he could voice out any sort of coherent thought, Tony beat him to it. “Okay, capsicum head, the theatrics are overrated. Give us the stone and we’ll be out of your hair — or spicy baldness, in your case — before good ol’ Stevie here has a stroke.”

He felt Tony move a little strangely next to him, and then there was a sudden warmth that shot through his fingers as Tony soothingly rubbed a gloved hand over Steve’s own. He hadn’t even realized he had balled his hands up into fists and his knuckles had gone white. The surge of warmth was painfully familiar, but that was the last thing he could think about as Red Skull’s reply tore through the crisp air.

And there it was again. The flicker of an almost wicked smile.

 

“If only it were that easy.”

 

* * *

 

“You _really_ have got to be shitting me.”

“Hear, hear.”

Steve could only stare down at the abyss that awaited either of them as Red Skull’s words resembled that of a broken record in his head.

 

_“What you seek lies in front of you, as does what you fear. For in order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange.”_

_“A soul... for a soul.”_

 

He looked back at Tony, who was already looking at him. “This is bullshit. It has to be.”

“Damn, three curse words in less than half an hour?” Tony picked up a small rock and threw it at his leg. “You deserve to get stoned for that.”

“Tony, I’m serious, there has to be another way."

Tony shook his head, his expression unreadable. “No. This is it, Cap.”

Steve shot him an incredulous look. Is Tony really going to give in that easily?

“You’re not actually serious, are you? We have to find another way, we can’t possibly follow through with this —“

“Listen to me.” Tony was absent-mindedly drawing things in the gravel with a twig, his voice unsteady. “Nebula already told us. Thanos took Gamora to Vormir, and returned without her. This is not bullshit, this is the furthest thing from bullshit, this is, in fact, the very opposite of bullshit. This is real.”

Tony finally looked up at him, and there was a determined gleam in his eye. “Whatever it takes.”

 

Steve let the weight of his words sink in, and the realization sent his heart plummeting through his stomach.

 

“Absolutely not.”

 

“Absolutely yes.”

 

“Not happening."

 

"Agree to disagree."

 

"I won't let you!”

 

“Ah, because you ordering me around is the one thing that can change my mind. Sure worked like a charm before.”

 

Steve felt a string of protests die on his tongue as the look in Tony’s eyes shifted, achingly anxious but steadfast, and he continued with absolute clarity. “Steve, I have never been more sure about anything else in my life. All that matters right now is that we get that stone, and we both know who it’s going to be. It’s almost as if all the years I’ve lived with shame and guilt led to this very moment. To this place, right now. Right here, you and me. All that poetic shit, you know?“

“Goddammit, Tony, stop holding yourself to the things you couldn’t have known were happening, to things you already paid the price for!“ Steve inhaled sharply, the misty cold air sending shockwaves through his lungs. “How many times do you have to almost die trying to save the world before you realize you’re worth a lot more than you think?”

Tony looked away. “It just isn’t enough, and it won’t ever be enough. I’ve hurt so many people, Steve. I’ve destroyed lives, broken families apart. I ended up ruining the very happiness I sought after my whole life. It has to be me.”

Steve was not having it. “For a supposed genius, you’re a real idiot. You changed that, a long time ago. You’ve given happiness more than you’ve taken it away. You continue to prove time and time again that you definitely _are_ the guy that makes the sacrifice play, even when you don’t have to. You’re right, everything special about me came out of a bottle, unlike you. Look at the things you do, everything you continue to give, even out of the suit. The world still needs Tony Stark. More than that, what about the people around you? You have Peter. Pepper. Rhodey. And…” 

 

_Me. No way in hell am I going to lose you again._

He lets the rest of it trail away unheard.

 

“So you’re saying Barnes and Sam aren’t worth it?” Tony got up and walked over to Steve, clutching his hands so gently he almost did a double take. “You sure as hell ain’t perfect, and you’ve definitely hurt the shit out of me, in and out. But you’re not just the serum, you’re way beyond it. You’re courageous, you’re down-to-earth, you’re a beacon of hope and you’re willing to do absolutely anything for the people you care about. Not to mention you have a stellar ass, really fucking glad I adjusted your suit to accommodate for that, have you _seen_ the way it perks whenever you do one of those dramatic superhero landings, god the way I have to restrain myself from just _gra_ —“

“Tony?”

“Right, sorry. Was making a point. Back to said point, you’re so much more than just the serum. Everything in that bottle would mean nothing if the guy it was injected into was anything less than what you are. The scrawny kid underneath the intimidating build and super strength? He’s one hell of a guy, and I trust him. Fuck, even after everything you’ve put me through, even after I keep getting torn apart, I still fucking trust you, Steve Rogers.” He was gripping Steve’s hands at this point, and he all but whispered his next words.

“And that’s why you have to promise me you’ll take care of them. You have to promise me that when all of this is over, you’ll make sure that they’re happy. Please, Steve, just promise me that.”

 

Steve felt a swelling in his chest, hot tears threatening to fall.

 

Self-control be damned.

 

“Tony, I can’t lose you. Not again. Not ever.” His hands started to tremble. “It wasn’t worth it, you know. All the things I should’ve done but didn’t, and the things I shouldn’t have done but did... It wasn’t worth it. I’m sorry."

Tony smiled wistfully at that, looking at their joined hands, thumbs now stroking Steve’s. “I know.” He looked up and the sheer fondness in his expression left Steve breathless. “I know.”

 

For a split second, Steve was able to forget. There were no stones, no Thanos, no suspended weight of the universe in the air. No sacrifices that had to be made, because all that mattered in that moment was them. It was always them. Steve and Tony. Tony and Steve. Again, and again, it always came back to them. He’d known for a very long time that the relationship between them had always transcended friendship, because no matter how many times they hate, and fight, and drive each other away, they somehow find themselves making their way back to each other. Steve Rogers and Tony Stark, intertwined with one another, trying the binds of fate.

 

But all of that was wiped from his mind as Tony’s gaze hardened with a steely resolve, and Steve was blasted in the chest with a repulsor as Tony took off towards the edge of the cliff. The ground under Steve cushioned his fall with an audible crack, and just as Tony took the leap, Steve hurled his shield at him, mercilessly knocking him out of the air and driving him straight into the ground. That was his window, and Steve, although slightly winded, had no doubts about taking it.

He painstakingly took a final glance at Tony, who was looking back at him, struggling to get back up. His chest ached as he looked at the man he loved, loved more than anyone could ever love another, loved with all the heat of the sun and the infinities among the stars.

 

“In another life, Tony.”

 

And without a second’s hesitation, he jumped.

 

Tony’s yell was drowned out by the rush of wind enveloping him, the chill sending prickles down his spine. He let it embrace him, embraced the inevitability of what was to come, and as the ground below finally came into view through the mist, he closed his eyes.

But just as he was about to give into the nothingness that awaited him, a sudden loud whirring from behind him, sharper than knives, cut through the air, and before he could react, Tony's iron suit latched itself onto him — his hands, his legs, his chest, and finally, the helmet closed around his face as he flew back to the top of the cliff, back to where Tony stood.

An irrational anger surged through him as he shouted at Tony, begging him to let him go, how he had to do this instead of him, how it was the one right thing he could finally do after all the years of mistakes after mistakes, after the pain he caused the people around him, the pain he caused Tony. But among all things, there was that dull ache in his heart, and it almost suffocated him — he refused to shy away from it any longer.

 

“I love you. _Please_ , Tony, I love you, I love you, I love you, and I can’t, no, I _won’t_ let you do this.”

 

Tony silently took a gloved hand in his. “FRIDAY, open the faceplate.” The faceplate clicked open, and Steve was greeted by a pair of glossy eyes. He opened his mouth to shake some sense into the man before him, but was abruptly cut off by a fierce heat on his mouth, lips warm upon his. Steve felt like he was floating.

 

Despite the initial shock, kissing Tony felt like the easiest thing in the world.

 

Sweet, gentle, yet desperate and full of longing. All the years of unspoken words, hidden feelings, all poured into one, single kiss. Steve softened against Tony’s touch, let the way he craved the warmth and the rush of absolute ecstasy that was now pulsating through his veins move him. How they were finally here, making up for lost time, regrets washed away by the electricity that burned through them — and that was all it took. Steve felt Tony mutter something, something meant for the two of them alone, as Tony wrenched himself free from his grasp, and threw himself off the cliff.

By the time Steve registered what had happened, it was too late. The ground below came into view once more and all he could do was shout and cry, as if any of that would somehow resurrect the lifeless body at the bottom of the abyss below, as if the air that pierced his chest with his shaky sobs would breathe life into it.

As everything around him went white, tears heavier than the heart he carried continued to flow as his legs gave way, the ghost of Tony’s last words an itch against his lips.

 

_“In another life, my love.”_

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> twitter / @chwehanyus


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